Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Thoughts from the Seattle Space Needle

I'm typing this as we enjoy the sights from the top of the space needle (posting this though a day later). It's a beautiful view. Even with the cloudy skies and rain, I can see why people enjoy living here. Our first day was spent soaking up the sights and sounds of Seattle. We just walked around the city, mainly Pike's Market. It's been a good day, but it's been tough for me to transition from being a mom to being a tourist. I miss my little girl. At first, all I wanted to do was grab a cab and take the first flight back to KC. Everywhere I looked there were kids and families enjoying time together. I felt so empty and I found myself not appreciating my surroundings or the experience.

I finally convinced myself that I'm on vacation and I can spend the entire time wishing I was with Ella. Yet, it wouldn't be until I am back in KC that I would realize what an amazing opportunity I had missed and I would find myself regretting how I wasted this time. I also realized that I can miss her and yet enjoy this time without her. Having fun without her is not a knock against me as a mom or diminish the love I have her. While I realize to most that this is a no brainer, for me, it's taken a day to comprehend. I also don't want Mike thinking that our time alone isn't important.

The hourly reports we receive from the local Smithville authorities is that Ella is doing great and getting along just fine. I didn't have any doubts, and knowing how much fun she is having is helping us to enjoy the trip. Unfortunately the last image we saw as we walked away from her was a very upset little girl crying in the window. It's a hard image to erase from my mind.

We are off to hit the Pike Pub Brewery next to the market and then we plan to join Chera and her boyfriend Mike for a tasty dinner at Purple, a local wine bar.

No comments: